| How to Become a Nicer Person to Others Posted: 31 Jan 2022 12:00 AM PST Having close family and friends who can act as your support system is proven to make you healthier and happier.[1] However, it's not always so easy to keep friends or family around, especially if you're mean or constantly have a negative attitude towards them. Luckily, it doesn't have to be this way forever. If you practice kindness daily and work to control your anger, you can become a nicer person and strengthen meaningful relationships with others. [Edit]Controlling Your Anger - Use a relaxation techniques to calm yourself.[2] As soon as you start to notice that you are feeling angry, take a moment to calm yourself. One good way to do this is by using a relaxation technique.[3] Some options include:
- Challenge unrealistic statements or thoughts. Unrealistic thought patterns can intensify feelings of anger, so try to identify and challenge these as they occur.[4]
- For example, an unrealistic thought might be something like, "My roommate never does anything to help keep our apartment clean! I do everything!"
- Before you allow yourself to get angrier due to this thought, take a moment to decide if this is really true. Does your roommate do different things than you do to keep the apartment clean? If so, then the word "never" in this statement is not realistic.
- Try rewriting the thought or statement into something more realistic, such as "I wish my roommate would pitch in a little more than she does with household chores."
- Improve your problem solving skills. Having good problem solving skills can also help to reduce feelings of anger and frustration. It may help you to feel more in control, even if you are dealing with something really frustrating. This is a skill that takes time to develop, so try to be patient.[5]
- When you are facing a problem, try taking time to identify the problem before you try to solve it. Then, make a list of all the possible solutions available to you and choose the best one. After putting your solution into action, reflect on how it went and see how you can adjust your strategy for a better result in the future.
- Don't let frustration or anger build up. When you don't say anything, and you're frustrated, bottling up your anger is not the best thing to do. Instead of letting frustration build to rage, speak up and confront the source of your frustration. Don't be afraid of making a situation awkward, because talking it out is better than being mean in the future.
- If you've felt disrespected or hurt by someone, you may want to inflict the same emotional pain upon them. Instead of doing this, let them know that they hurt your feelings and that you felt disrespected by their actions.
- Instead of letting your anger build, let the person know what they did wrong. Say something like "I don't like that you did that. It really makes me angry and upset."
- Channel your energy into something positive. Instead of using your energy to be mean to others, redirect it to a sport or hobby that you want to pursue.[6] Make sure to stay active. When you exercise or do something active, it releases positive endorphins in your brain that make you happier.[7]
- You can do a team sport like football, baseball, soccer, or hockey.
- If you don't like physical sports, try doing something creative like learning how to play an instrument or learning how to paint.
- Walk away when you start to get angry. Identify when your anger starts to escalate and be aware of how mad you are. When you feel like you're reaching that place, take a step back from the argument and walk away.[8] Be polite and explain why you're walking away. Don't leave the situation up in the air forever. Regain your composure and talk to the person again when your anger has subsided.
- You can say, "I need to take a walk because I'm getting really angry and I'm trying to stay calm. I need some time to think about this, but we can talk when I get back."
[Edit]Being Kind to Others - Practice being more compassionate. Make it a point to be kinder to others, and try to see things from their perspective. Instead of making comments that would hurt someone's feelings, think of ways to make their day better. If you have the time, go out of your way to do small things for others, and they will come to appreciate you more.
- For instance, instead of making fun of someone to make yourself feel better, give them a compliment and make their day better.
- Practicing compassion can make you a healthier and happier person.[9]
- You can also buy a friend a small gift like candy or a book to show your appreciation for them.
- Develop your communication skills. Being able to listen well and communicate in a constructive, assertive way may also help you to feel in control of your anger and be kind to others.[10] Communicating your feelings and emotions will help other people understand your frame of mind and relieve a lot of stress. Often arguments or disagreements can arise because of a lack of communication and a lack of understanding when it comes to people's motivations. Try to be more truthful in conversation, even if it makes the situation less than perfect, or you think that the person may not like you for it. Do not skirt around issues that make you feel uncomfortable.
- Put away distractions and give the person your full attention. As you listen, try to suspend judgment. Just try to understand what the person is saying and where they are coming from.
- When you express yourself, use "I" statements instead of "you" statements. Try saying things like, "I feel frustrated when you forget to pick up your dishes." Don't say things like, "You never clean up after yourself!"
- Communicating effectively also means sometimes being vulnerable and talking about things that could be embarrassing.
- For example, if a friend does something you don't approve of, instead of yelling and saying things that you'll regret, say something like, "When you made that joke, and everyone laughed, it made me feel sad. I was humiliated, and even though you didn't think it was a big deal, it really hurt my feelings."
- Be more patient. People can't read your mind and for some, learning new things may take longer for them than it takes for others. Instead of escalating to anger immediately, be more patient with people. Think back to when you were doing something for the first time or when you needed help. Realize that not everyone's perfect. If someone is doing something that annoys you, instead of letting it go until you're angry, confront the person and have a conversation.
- If your roommate is tapping their pencil and it's stopping you from doing your work, say something like "Hey, I know this seems crazy, but I really can't get this paper done while you're tapping that pencil. Do you mind stopping while I do my work?"
- Don't be cynical. Being cynical all the time can put you in a bad mood and make you more irritable. Typically cynicism is a defense mechanism that you're likely to employ when you are disappointed or feel let down. Instead of expressing your emotions in a healthy and constructive way, you bottle them up and minimize the impact of your feelings to other people and yourself.[11] This can spiral into having a negative view of the world, and it can put you in a constant state of anger.
- Don't put down other people's work or effort. Admire someone when they excel at something instead of dismissing it or minimizing it.
- Try to reduce the amount of judgment you put on others. If you don't understand a subculture or demographic of people, look to immerse yourself in their world instead of senselessly hating it.
- Practice empathy. Empathy involves understanding and internalizing the feelings and emotions of another person. Try to put yourself in the person's shoes, and talk to people without passing judgment on them first. When someone is experiencing pain, relate to their emotions instead of dismissing them. Engage in active listening instead of waiting for the other person to stop talking. Internalize what they are saying, and try to feel the emotions that they feel. This can give you a better understanding of their perspective and actions.
- To improve your active listening, concentrate on paying attention to what the person is saying, provide feedback to show that you're listening, and defer any judgment you may have. Instead of criticizing them, try supporting the person.
- Think back to a time when you were under similar circumstances and try to reflect on how badly it felt.
- Stop being defensive. Don't put walls up and don't be suspicious of everyone you meet. This hurts your interactions with others. If you've done something wrong, take personal responsibility for your actions and don't blame other people for things you've done. Be open to making new friends and improving existing friendships.
- If someone makes a valid suggestion, instead of getting angry at them for pointing out a weakness, say "You're right. I need to work on it, and I am, but it's a process."
- Instead of automatically taking comments in a negative light, ask the person "What do you mean by that?" Once they explain, it may not be as harmful as you initially thought.
[Edit]Doing Selfless Acts - Help people when you see them in need. Instead of turning away or thinking that it's someone else's responsibility, do your best to help people that are in need. Think of easy things that you can do during your day to help people that can't help themselves. You could help a younger family member set up their computer or help an elderly person with their groceries.
- The more you help others on your accord, the happier you'll be.[12]
- Do more things around the house. If you're younger, this means doing your chores without being asked and genuinely trying to help when you see that your family is overwhelmed. If you are a parent or in a relationship, do something for your partner like fixing something that's been broken, or making dinner for them. Find extra things to do around the house to alleviate your partner's stress.
- Communicate with your family and ask them if there's anything else that needs to be done around the house.
- A clean and organized house can actually boost your energy and make you happier.[13]
- Be there for your friends when they need someone to talk to. Friendship is a critical aspect in your happiness. Having a support system to talk to when times are bad gives us a sense of belonging. Having friends will lower your blood pressure and you'll be less prone to depression.[14] However, friendship is built on communication and vulnerability. If you're mean or judgemental, friends will not want to come to you, and will not be as supportive when you need them.
- Stay attentive and listen.
- Sometimes friends don't want advice, just someone to talk to.
- If you've talked to your friend about a serious issue, it'll be easier to talk to them about serious problems in your life.
- Work on improving your community. If you have the time, consider volunteering at a local community center, homeless shelter, or soup kitchen near you. Look into other projects locally, like efforts to that plant trees or work to beautify your town. The more you get to know other people who are working for a positive future, the more fulfilled you'll feel, and less prone to angry outbursts.
- Volunteering with a group of people will also give you a sense of belonging to a community which will increase your happiness and make you less angry. Having a support system when times are hard can help us cope with daily stress.
[Edit]Related wikiHows [Edit]References [Edit]Quick Summary |
| How to Make a Beaded Lizard Posted: 30 Jan 2022 04:00 PM PST Here's a cute, fun, and creative afternoon activity that you can make and attach to your backpack or even wear as a necklace. All it takes are some beads, string, and a keychain clasp. [Edit]Preparing the Body - Cut a roughly three-foot length of 1/8th-inch ribbon or string. The longer the string, the longer the lizard. Three feet is a good start.
- Fold the string in half so that the two ends meet. This will lead to a loop at the other end of the string.
- Take the loop and run it through the bottom of a keychain clasp. Really, any sort of clasp will work. All you need to do is create a slipknot around the clasp. You should have your loop on one side of the clasp, and the long excess string on the other.
- Pull the ends through the loop to create a slipknot. Reach into the loop and pull the strings through, pulling until tight. This creates a simple slip knot that will hold the lizard in place as you work.
- Tape the clasp down to the table so that the strings drape towards you. Make sure the strings are not tangled up, and that you can clearly tell which string is the left string and which one is the right.
[Edit]Building the Head and Neck - Add two beads to the leftmost string. These beads will be your body, so choose the color you want for the bulk of the lizard. Don't feed the beads all the way down; just let them dangle a bit towards the end. In this video, the body will be yellow.
- Thread the right string through the beads the opposite way. If the leftmost string enters through the left, thread this one through from the right. You'll have both string going through the center of the two beads in opposite directions.
- Pull both ends of the strings until the beads slide up to the keychain clasp. Lightly pull on the opposite ends to force the beads up to the top.
- Feed three more beads -- two eyes and a body color -- onto the leftmost string. You want to sandwich the body bead with the two eye colors. Here, the eyes are green and the body is yellow, so you'd put them on as green, yellow, green.
- Slide the right side through the beads and pull both ends until the beads slide to the top. Repeat the same procedure as you did with the first two body beads. Slide the three beads on the left string, thread the right through them, then pull both strings to move the beads to the top.
- Repeat the whole procedure with two more beads to make the "neck." Take two body colors, thread them on the left, slide the right through, and pull tight. This is your neck.
- Take three more body beads and pull them through. Again, it is the same procedure. For a little flair, you can use a different color for the center bead here, allowing you to put a "stripe" on your lizard's back.
- These three beads are the beginning of the "back." You'll need to start the limbs after this.
[Edit]Building The Legs - Set aside two beads for the body and three other beads for the feet. Here, the body beads are still yellow and the feet will be black.
- Thread the two body beads on the left string and slide them down close to the body. Push them almost all the way to the body. These are your legs.
- Slide the black beads on, just above the legs. Keep them close, but separated.
- Thread the end of the left string through the two beads for the leg. You just want to thread through your two yellow beads, not the three for the feet.
- Pull the string tight to pull everything together, adjusting slightly as necessary. Use your fingers to make sure nothing bunches up. This is your first leg! Note how it only requires the left string to make -- you should never touch the right one when making the left leg.
- Repeat the process with the other string to make the right leg. Once done, it is time to move back to the body.
[Edit]Finishing the Body and Tail - Build three more body rows identically to the first. Put three beads on the left string, remembering to alternate them if you're doing a two-colored body. Then slide the right string in the opposite direction as the left and pull the two ends to slide the beads up to the body.
- You need three more rows before starting the feet again.
- Make two more legs the same way you made the first two. After the three lengths of the body, add two more legs. The process is identical.
- Add two more body beads, to make the base of the tail (identical to the neck). You should have the process down pat by now. Two beads on the left string, feed through the right string and pull tight.
- Slide the first tail bead on the left string, thread the right string through the opposite side, and pull. The tail is simply the same process as the body, but its only one bead per layer. You can choose any color you want. Alternating looks great too, and you can use as many beads as you want for the length of tail you like.
- Tie a double knot at the end of the tail to keep the beads in place. You can tie any knot you want, but a simple square knot will do just fine. You can use the knot used to tie your shoes as well, but make sure you double knot it.[1]
[Edit]Things You'll Need - Pony Beads (about 60)
- 1/8th-inch wide ribbon
- Scissors
- Beads
- Tape
- Nice flat surface (recommended)
- You can mix and match colors and lengths with ease once you get used to the process. For a bigger lizard, add one bead to each smaller section (legs, head, neck) and two beads to each body section. This will keep the proportions roughly the same.
[Edit]References
[Edit]Quick Summary |
| How to Clean and Organize Your Room Posted: 30 Jan 2022 08:00 AM PST Between dirty clothes, clutter, and other waste, cleaning your room might be a trouble in your to-do list. And you do not need to worry! The solution to simple, effective cleaning is breaking the task down into smaller chores. You'd be stunned at how much you can accomplish by switching up how you clean and organize. Here are 14 pro tips and tricks to help you clean and organize your room. [Edit]Go through your clutter with the 4-box method. - Set out 4 boxes or bags and label "keep," "donate," "store," and "trash." Keep items are pretty self-explanatory—these are items that you still actively need or want, and plan on storing in your room. In the donate pile, set aside any gently-used items that you don't want or need anymore. Use the "store" pile for items that can be moved into long-term storage. Then, dedicate the "trash" box to any junk or clutter that's just taking up space in your room.[1]
- For instance, a pair of winter snow boots might go in the "store" pile, while old candy wrappers would go in the "trash" pile.
[Edit]Wipe off any dusty surfaces. - Go over all the surfaces in your room with a damp cloth. Focus especially on any dressers, mirrors, art pieces, or other stationary accessories in your living space.[2] Then, clean off your walls with a cotton mop, or suck up any leftover dust with a vacuum extension.[3]
- A damp cloth helps pick up the dust and wipe the surface clean.
[Edit]Vacuum your bedroom floor. - Suck up any leftover dust, dirt, or crumbs that have collected over time. Focus on hard-to-reach places, like beneath your bed and behind different pieces of furniture. If you'd really like to go the extra mile, vacuum off your mattress, too.[4]
[Edit]Wash and change your sheets. - Peel off your old sheets and blankets and toss them in the wash. Once they're washed and dried, re-make your bed.[5]
- Feel free to clean your old pillows and pillowcases, too.
[Edit]Clean out your wardrobe. - Go through each article of clothing and decide what you want to keep. If you like the clothing and it still fits well, keep it in your closet for another few seasons. If the garment is just taking up space, donate or toss it.[6]
- Ideally, it's a good idea to go through your wardrobe twice a year.
[Edit]Organize your closet by color. - Sort your clothes from light to dark. Hang up your clothes in similar color groupings, placing the lighter garments on the left and your darker garments on the right. This will make your closet a lot easier to navigate![7]
- Make the switch from plastic to velvet hangers. These take up less space, and prevent your clothes from slipping off.[8]
[Edit]Arrange the clothes in your drawers by size. - Place smaller items in the top drawers and larger items toward the bottom. You can store your socks and underwear in the upper drawers, then keep folded shirts and bottoms in the lower drawers.[9]
- Organize your clothes by type within each drawer so they're easy to find. For example, keep your socks and underwear separated if you're storing them in the same drawer.
- You can make your own cardboard dividers to help keep your underwear organized. Just hot-glue thin sections of cardboard together into diamond-shaped cubbies. Place the cubbies in your dresser drawer and slide your folded underwear into each cubby slot.[10]
[Edit]Opt for under-the-bed storage. - Under-the-bed storage helps you maximize your bedroom space. Opt for rolling storage boxes, which are easy to pull out from under your bed. Storage baskets, color-coordinated plastic bins, and specialty drawers are also great options for keeping your belongings organized.[11]
- Some underbed storage drawers are designed specifically for shoes.
- Other types of storage cater to children's toys, folded clothes, and other odds and ends.
- Invest in tables or bins that rest snugly at the foot of your bed. A chest offers extra storage space, while a small basket gives you some flexibility with your laundry. Above all, choose a storage item that best fits the demands of your living space.[12]
- If you have a lot of extra shoes, a small shoe shelf could be a handy addition to the foot of your bed.
[Edit]Eliminate clutter with storage ottomans. - Storage ottomans are very easy to use. Some ottomans let you stash your belongings inside, while others come with built-in shelves. You can double certain types of ottomans as chairs or tables, too.[13]
- Your wall is a storage container all on its own! Arrange adhesive hooks and organizers along your wall—these are easy, efficient ways to both decorate your room and eliminate unwanted clutter.[14]
- For instance, you might hang up and organize your scarves on your wall instead of leaving them floating around your room.
- You could organize your belts on different wall hooks.
- You might store your handbags and purses on wall hooks when you're not using them.
[Edit]Use your door for storage. - Special hooks and organizers can transform your door into storage space. Screw towel hooks into your bedroom door as an easy, handy way to hold your old tote bags. To really maximize your space, hang up a wire organizer over your door, which can hold lots of things at once.[15]
- For example, you might sort your favorite beauty products into different bags or shelves along your door.
[Edit]Display your knick-knacks on a pegboard. - Lean a large pegboard against an open section of your wall. Balance thin sheets of wood on pegs to create makeshift shelves, which can display colorful decor, sentimental pictures, or anything else you'd like to show off.[16]
- The pegs create the support for your "shelf," and the sheet of wood goes on top of the begs.
[Edit]Double your desk as a nightstand. - Slide your desk over so it's right next to your bed. Dedicate 1 side of the desk to a lamp, alarm clock, and space for a charging smartphone. To really make the most of your space, slide your chair or stool under the desk when you're not using it.[17]
- Dust off ceiling fan blades with an old pillowcase—that way, the dust will collect in the case instead of scattering around.[18]
[Edit]Related wikiHows [Edit]References [Edit]Quick Summary |
| How to Cut Curly Hair in Layers Posted: 30 Jan 2022 12:00 AM PST Adding layers to curly hair can make your hairdo springier and more vibrant. Cutting them yourself can save you a lot of money, but giving yourself a haircut can be intimidating. It's not that hard, though, if you start with the right tools. Remember to cut curly hair while it's dry so you can see the shape of your haircut as you go. Work slowly in sections to add layers that completely transform your look! [Edit]Getting Your Hair Ready to Be Cut - Find some sharp shears and a wide-tooth comb. Don't use just any scissors—find some shears especially made for cutting hair, as these will be sharp enough to avoid tearing the ends of your hair when you cut it. A wide-toothed comb is also important when working with curly hair. In fact, the wider the better! This will detangle your hair and it won't stretch out the hair as much and will help prevent frizz.[1]
- Make sure you only ever use your shears for cutting hair. Using them on other objects makes them become dull more quickly.[2]
- Stay away from using razors if you have curly hair. This can damage your hair and promote frizz.[3]
- Wash, condition, and detangle your hair. Add conditioner and detangle your hair completely. Depending on the kind of conditioner you use, you can comb it through or just apply it and wash it. Detangling your hair will allow you to work with it more easily. Making sure your hair is properly moisturized will help you better identify what hair is damaged and needs to go—sometimes the ends of your hair appear damaged when, in fact, they're just dry.[4]
- Dry your hair. Air-dry your hair, or dry it with a microfiber towel, which is gentler on your hair. Air-drying or gentle towel drying will allow your curls resume their ordinary shape and length. Cutting your hair while it's dry allows you to see immediately what the final cut is going to look like. Furthermore, curls spring up and get shorter as they dry, so you're at risk of cutting your layers too short if you chop them while they're wet.[5]
- It's okay if your hair is a little damp, as long as it is not wet.
- Cutting dry hair gives you less control over it, so if you're finding it too hard to manage sectioning and cutting completely dry hair, you can lightly dampen it with a spray bottle.[6]
[Edit]Removing Overall Length - Divide your hair in half into two sections. Make a part down the center of your head, starting in the middle by your forehead and continuing all the way back to the nape of your neck. Pull the sections forward over your shoulders.[7]
- Put hair ties on each section where you want to make a cut. Tie a hair band over the entire section, and slide the ties down until they're just above where you want your final length to be.[8]
- If you have shorter hair, use clips to section your hair into two or more pieces, and place a clip just above where you want to cut.
- At first, aim to trim off an inch or two less than you plan to ultimately cut. You'll probably have to cut more as you even out the length, and you don't want to end up with too-short hair. You can always remove more later.
- Cut the sections off under your hair tie. Chop your hair in a straight line. Use multiple cuts to get all the way through the section. This will leave you with blunt-cut ends.[9]
- If you want to thin out the ends of your hair and make them look more blended, cut upwards into each section, at a slight angle.[10]
- Undo the sections and tidy up the length. Remove your hair ties or clips and visually assess your hair. If you see any extra long strands, give them a quick chop. Use two mirrors to look at the back of your hair and straighten out any uneven edges.
- Make sure your hair is the same length on both sides of your head. Pull strands of hair from each side forward and verify that they're the same length. You may need to put your hair back in sections and cut a little bit more off of one side.
- If you're having difficulty getting all of your hair to be one even length, you can also try gathering up all of your hair into a ponytail on top of your head and cutting the ends. This will add some layers into your hair as well. Use clips if your hair is too short for a ponytail.[11]
[Edit]Cutting Layers into Your Hair - Divide your hair into four sections. Part your hair down the middle from front to back until your hair is divided in half. Next, divide these halves by making a part from your ear moving backwards towards the middle part.
- To part your hair, you can draw the tip of a comb across your scalp. Alternately, put your fingertips on either end of where you want the part to be, and drag your fingers towards each other until they meet.[12]
- To make the finished hairstyle look more natural, use a zig-zag shape when you part your hair. The different sections will blend together more easily.[13]
- Once you've separated out each section, secure the hair with a clip to keep it in place.
- Pull the front middle section straight up over your head. Undo the clip keeping the section in place and stretch it up vertically, perpendicular to the floor. You can also pull it out slightly at an angle away from your head.[14]
- For shorter layers, hold your hair straight up over your head.
- If you prefer longer layers, hold your hair straight out, away from your head, parallel to the ground. If you use this method, the top layers will be longer and closer in length to the bottom layers.
- Grasp the ends of the hair between your index and middle fingers. With your hand that is not holding the scissors, use your first 2 fingers to grab the section of hair at its base, closest to your scalp. Slide your fingers up the length of the hair until you reach the point where you want to make a cut.
- Look for damage at the ends of your hair. If you see frizz or breakage, try to remove all of it when you cut your layers.
- Angle your fingers so that you will cut the hair to be shorter in the front and longer in the back. This type of cut will help push your hair away from your face.[15]
- Trim only a small amount of hair at first. You can always go back later and take more off, but it can be tough to fix a haircut if you cut too much off.[16] However, keep in mind that you will need to trim about from the ends to notice layers forming.
- Cut the hair off above your fingers. Use several small chops until you've trimmed all of the hair. Then, angle your scissors so they're nearly parallel to your hair, and cut a few times into your hair to thin the ends out slightly.[17]
- Repeat the process on the next section. Unclip one of the sections next to the first. Pull the hair straight up, or at the same outward angle that you used when you cut the first section. Use the first section as a guide to determine how much hair to trim—hold up both pieces of hair next to each other, and cut off the new section to be the same length as the first.[18]
- When pulling sections upwards to trim them, try to use the same amount of tension so that one section doesn't end up shorter than another.
- Continue lifting and cutting each section in the same way. Bring each section up and forward to the same imaginary point above your head before making the cut. Because the hair on the bottom of your head has further to travel when it is lifted up above your head, it will end up being longer than the hair on top of your head.[19]
- Don't try to use this process for the bottom sections at the nape of your neck. If you leave these unlayered, they will provide a strong, heavy bottom layer. If you layer them, the ends of your hair might appear too thin.[20]
- Finish your cut by trimming any areas that stick out. Once you are done cutting the basic layers, let your hair fall naturally around your head, like you would normally wear it. If there are pieces that look too long or that stick out too far away from the rest of your hair, give them a quick trim.[21]
- The overall shape of your hair should be fairly even and symmetrical. If the curls on one side of your head are sticking out a lot farther than they are on the other side, resection the longer hair and trim each of these sections to be a little shorter.
[Edit]Things You'll Need - Sharp shears
- Wide-toothed comb
- Shower
- Conditioner
- Spray bottle of water
- Wall mirror
- Handheld mirror
- Trim your hair every 3-6 months. It's important to regularly cut off dead or damaged hair to keep your overall hair looking and growing healthy. Trim it more often if you're treating your hair with chemicals or if you regularly expose your hair to heat.
- Get a friend to look at the hair in the back of your head to see if it's even. Have them point out curls that are too long.
- If your haircut looks very uneven or is not what you were expecting, don't try to keep cutting off more and more hair. Make an appointment at a salon and have a professional help you fix it.
[Edit]Warnings - Avoid brushing your curls. Brushing your hair makes it more likely to break, which in turn makes it frizzier. If your hair needs to be detangled, wash and condition it, and while the conditioner is still in, run a wide tooth comb through your hair. This is helpful whether you have tight or loose curls.
[Edit]References [Edit]Quick Summary |
| How to Be Happy Being Yourself Posted: 29 Jan 2022 04:00 PM PST It's easy to wish you looked like or acted like someone else, or had the cushy job or great boyfriend that someone else has. No matter who you are, you can learn to be happy and fulfilled with your life. Take time to appreciate your talents and characteristics while forming a healthy body image and self-esteem. Focus on the positive aspects of your job, hobbies, and lifestyle.[1] Fostering strong and close relationships can help you feel more satisfied and confident in your lifestyle. [Edit]Loving Who You Are - Identify what makes you unique and wonderful. Recognizing what you love about yourself first will make you much more comfortable in your own skin. Start by making a list of all of the things you love about yourself, whether it's your free spirit, your work ethic, or your shiny hair.[2]
- Find at least 10 things you like about yourself. Think about your talents, accomplishments, or characteristics.
- Appreciate what makes you unique. Perhaps you speak four languages, can walk on your hands, or can instantly make new friends. Not everyone can do that, but you can!
- Redirect negative thoughts into positive ones. For example, instead of thinking "I'm not pretty enough," say "I look great today!"
- Practice gratitude in your daily life. Actively giving thanks helps you recognize the wonderful people, things, and opportunities in your life. Make a daily habit of giving thanks to those you love. Appreciate your opportunities, strengths, skills, and blessings.[3]
- Keep a gratitude journal and write everything that you're thankful for. You might include your family, friends, home, hobbies, opportunities, or health. Add 1 thing to this journal every day. If you're feeling upset or down, try reading through the journal to cheer you up.
- Always say thank you, whether you're thanking your local barista for an amazing cup of coffee or your father for always being there for you.
- Fill your life with laughter. Always leave some room for laughter in your daily life. No matter how dire your life may seem at a given moment, never forget to take a break to laugh. You'll feel better in both the short-term and the long-term.[4]
- Be just plain silly. Tell a corny joke, make a bad pun, or just dance around like a fool. Why not?
- Laugh at your mistakes. This can defuse the situation and help you realize that things aren't so bad.
- Watch a comedy or a comedian. This will make you laugh and can cheer you up.
- Be around people who love to laugh. Laughter is contagious!
- Come to terms with your flaws. Confidence is the key to happiness, but everyone has flaws and weaknesses. Instead of obsessing over your perceived flaws, embrace them. If you want, ask yourself what you can do to improve yourself in this regard.[5]
- Make a list of things you want to work on. Make manageable goals to improve. If you hate that you're always forgetting things, try getting a planner or download a calendar app. Set alarms for when you need to do something.
- Learn to live with some of your flaws. Perhaps you won't ever get over your clumsiness, but that's okay! Try to laugh when you stumble or brush it off as though it doesn't matter.
- Forgive yourself. Let's face it: we've all done something we're less than proud of. Whatever you did, you should recognize that it was wrong and understand why you did it, but after that, it's time to let it go.
[Edit]Creating a Healthy Body Image - Identify what you love about your body. Feeling good about your body can go a long way in helping you be happy with who you are. Look at yourself and appreciate your best features.[6]
- You may not love everything about your face, but you should be able to pick 1 or 2 things, like your eyes or your lips, that stand out. When you look at yourself, remind yourself how great this part of you looks.
- Remind yourself what your body is capable of. Try to love your body for its ability to sing, dance, imagine, or jump.
- Exercise. Exercise can boost your confidence and your mood, even if you're not looking to lose weight or become stronger. Just working out for 30 minutes 2-3 times a week can increase your energy and confidence. Find what type of workout works for you and stick with it.[7]
- Mindful exercises, like yoga or tai chi, can give you a sense of calm and help you meditate about your body.
- Team sports, like soccer or softball, are tons of fun. They add an important social element to your exercise that can help you feel more fulfilled.
- Running, biking, swimming, or even just taking a walk can help you clear your mind while helping you become healthy.[8]
- Eat healthy foods to improve your mood. Improving your diet can help your mind and body. Having a good balance between fruits and veggies, proteins, and carbs can help you feel more in tune with your body.[9]
- Foods high in fiber and omega 3-fatty acids can improve your mood and help you feel happier. These include foods like whole wheat bread, brown rice, fish, green vegetables, and walnuts.[10]
- Cook your own food from scratch instead of buying premade foods. Cooking can help you make healthier decisions, and you'll get more satisfaction from your meal.
- It's okay to indulge in the occasional burger or ice cream, but having too many processed or fatty foods will make you feel tired or sluggish.
- Create a wardrobe that makes you look and feel good. Being happy with what you're wearing can make or break how you feel about your appearance. If your clothes are dirty, don't fit well, or just don't look right, it can affect your mood and self-esteem. Choose a style that reflects your unique personality.[11]
- Choose clothing that is comfortable for your body. Don't try to wear clothing that is too big or too small.
- Have a few key items that you adore. Having a favorite pair of jeans, a beautiful knitted sweater, or a trendy scarf can really help you feel good about how you look.
- Jewelry, belts, scarves, and shoes can really pull an outfit together. If you're missing that extra touch, try adding an accessory to it.
[Edit]Fostering a Joyful Lifestyle - Focus on the positive aspects of your job. Sure, some of your work may be frustrating or even boring, but pick a few things you love about your job, whether it's interacting with clients or customers, learning new things, or having the opportunity to travel occasionally.[12]
- If you're struggling at work, reframe how you approach your job. Personalize your workspace with pictures or plants. Avoid taking on extra projects if you're overworked.
- Take the time to get to know and appreciate the people you work with. You may feel like you have nothing in common, but if you make the extra effort to be friendly, it will make you much more eager to wake up to go to work.
- Appreciate what your job can do for you. On hard days, remember that your job allows you to put food on the table.
- Pursue hobbies and activities that interest you.[13] Hobbies and interests outside of work give you something to look forward to. This helps you become a more well-rounded and interesting person. If you don't have any hobbies currently, you might:[14]
- Develop your artistic side. Try your hand at writing a poem, a song, or painting. You don't have to be great at it, but you can have fun in the process.
- Learn a new language. This will make you feel more cultured and it can help you find a great job.
- Join a team sport. Not only will you get a great workout, but you can make amazing friends.
- Take an evening class. Learn something that you're interested in, such as coding, woodworking, or ancient mythology.
- Set a routine that works for you.[15] A routine allows you to organize your life in a way that make every day activities pass in a breeze. If you feel stressed, hurried, or bored at certain points of your day, try shaking things up. Switch around your routine until you find something that works.[16]
- Don't rush around in the morning. Give yourself enough time to eat a healthy breakfast and drive to work to arrive a few minutes early. Set your clothes out the night before or pack all of your lunches at the beginning of the week.
- Even if your day is super-packed, make some time for yourself. Read a book during your lunch break, watch your favorite show before you go to bed, or wake up early enough to meditate.
- Get plenty of rest. Go to bed and wake up at around the same time every day so your body develops a routine. This can help you feel more rested in the morning.
- Try new experiences. Experiences, and not material items, are the key to happiness. Trying new experiences can help you step outside of your comfort zone while giving you many interesting and unique memories.[17]
- Explore your surroundings and natural environments. Take a hike, go rafting, or try rock climbing.
- Take a weekend trip, perhaps to a nearby city, mountain, or beach. Set aside 1 week a year for a much bigger trip to see your family or to visit a somewhere new, like New York City or the Grand Canyon.
- Attend concerts, museum openings, or new movies in your area. This can help develop your mind and expose you to new experiences in your own town.
- Create a clean and comfortable living space. Feeling safe, comfortable, and at peace in your own living space can make the difference between being happy and being cooped up. Decorate your home in a way that makes you cheerful or energetic.[18]
- Clean up any clutter. Put away things where they belong, and avoid adding too much furniture to an area. Keeping an open, light room can go a long way in creating a happy space.
- Filling your home with photos of your loved ones, souvenirs from your favorite vacations, or paintings of your favorite spots can help remind you of what makes you happy.
- Boost your mood at home by painting your walls light or bright colors, like soft blue, lavender, or yellow.
- Make changes if you're not happy with your routine or lifestyle. If you're truly unhappy with an aspect of your life, you may have the power to change it. Take the initiative to move on and start something new.[19]
- If you hate your job so much that it is causing stress or anxiety, it may be time to find a new job.
- Maybe you loved training for marathons for the past decade, but suddenly you dread all of your training runs. Spice things up by finding a new way to work out or spend your time.
- If you feel stuck, bored, or isolated in your town, consider moving or take a vacation to somewhere new.
[Edit]Establishing a Strong Social Network - Find supportive, positive friends. Having a network of close friends is one the best ways to become happy with yourself in the long run. Having the right friends can improve your self-esteem, make you feel needed, and boost your self-confidence.[20]
- Treasure old friendships. Maintain these relationships with frequent visits, emails, phone calls, or skype sessions.
- If you've met someone who you really click with, don't be afraid to ask them on a coffee date to see if you can get to know each other better.
- Dump your toxic friends. If you have a friend who makes you feel terrible about yourself or is so negative that they manage to ruin your mood every time you hang out, it may be time to let them go.
- Appreciate your family. In many cases, nobody has done more for you or knows you better than your parents or siblings. Whether you're off at college, living in a different country, or sharing a house with your family members, it's important to be happy with who they are in order to be truly happy being yourself.[21]
- If you have a good relationship with your parents, take time to talk to them often, and tell them you love them. Don't forget to thank them!
- Treat your siblings well. Even if you sometimes you feel like you and your sibling live on different planets, you still share a common bond of knowing what it's like to grow up in the same place with the same parents.
- Even if you don't have a strong relationship with your biological family, you can appreciate those who are like family in your life. Consider who you might consider to be your family, and let them know how you feel.
- Participate in your community. Feeling involved in your neighborhood, city, religion, school, or other community group can make you feel like you belong to something bigger. This can help you create long-lasting relationships and find interesting things to do.[22]
- Introduce yourself to your neighbors. Your neighbors will not only make you feel involved in where you live, but they could end up being your best friends.
- Attend town hall meetings, book clubs on your streets, concerts by local musicians, volunteer park clean-up days, or any other events that make you feel involved in local culture or politics.
- Volunteering can give you a deep sense of fulfillment and help you meet others in your community. Look for organizations and causes you believe in. You might raise money for the homeless or build houses for low-income families.[23]
- Foster healthy romantic relationships. Romance can be very fulfilling, but it is important to make sure that your relationships are founded on love, trust, and strong communication. A toxic romantic entanglement can cause significant stress and unhappiness.[24]
- If you have a great significant other, communicate openly with each other on a daily basis. Make sure that both partners are fulfilled and satisfied with the relationship.
- If you're single and dating lots of people, have fun with it. Going on date after date may get frustrating, but if you stay positive, you're more likely to find the right person.
- If you're single and not looking, that's okay too! If you're not at a point in your life where you want to date anyone, be happy with who you are and the decisions you're making.
- Learn to forgive. You won't be able to fully enjoy your relationships if you're holding a grudge or stuck in the past. Learning to forgive the people you love for their past mistakes is the only way to move forward in your relationships.[25]
- If someone has really hurt you, try looking at it from their perspective. Your friend may have hurt you with the best intentions, or might not have been thinking clearly.
- Learn to accept an apology. If your friend, mother, or significant other is truly sincere and sorry about something, learn to accept an apology. Try to move on as best you can.
- If you hurt the other person, say you're sorry too.
- Do something that you love at least once a day, whether it be listening to a song that you love, or dancing in your underwear in your bedroom.
- Try helping others. There is nothing like helping someone else to help improve your self-confidence and to make you realize how lucky you are.
- Don't compare yourself to other people. This will only make you frustrated. Instead of focusing on what others have, focus on what makes you who you are.
[Edit]Warnings - If you've tried everything and you still feel deeply unhappy with who you are, you may be suffering from depression and should seek professional help.
[Edit]References __ [Edit]Quick Summary |
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