| How to Feel Better After a Breakup Posted: 26 Jan 2022 12:00 AM PST Breakups are hard, and after a breakup you might feel like you will never be happy again. These feelings are common and completely normal, but this is simply not true. You will feel better with time. However, if you are looking for ways to feel better now, there are several things you can do to work through your emotions, boost your mood, and move forward in your life. [Edit]Processing Your Feelings After a Breakup - Give yourself time to grieve and work through your emotions. Don't force yourself to move on if you don't feel ready. It is perfectly fine to take your time and allow yourself to feel bad for a while. It may only take you a couple of weeks to feel better or you may need months or longer to work through your emotions. Don't rush it![1]
- The longer the relationship was, the longer it may take to work through your emotions. For example, you will likely recover from a 2-month relationship much more quickly than a 2-year relationship.
- Accept your feelings as a normal part of the process. After a breakup, you will likely go through a gamut of emotions, such as sadness, anger, and anxiety. While it may seem like you will never feel better, these feelings are temporary and they will pass. Remind yourself of this any time you start to feel overwhelmed or hopeless.[2]
- Try saying or writing something like, "I am angry that my relationship ended, and that is totally normal. Everyone who has been through a breakup has experienced something similar. They survived and so will I."
- Feeling unmoored and foggy-headed are natural and normal reactions to being apart from someone when you're used to having them around all the time. It takes time for your brain to adjust to the absence of the other person.
- Acknowledge and react to your feelings. Name the feeling, accept it, and let the feelings take over for a little while. Take a moment to say to yourself, "I feel sad right now," and then allow yourself to feel sad. This is a great way to work through your feelings. Do what feels natural to you in these moments, such as crying, writing about how you feel, or talking about your feelings with someone you trust.[3]
- Try writing in a journal as a way to acknowledge and express your feelings. Spend 15 minutes or longer daily writing about your feelings.
- If you wish you could speak directly to your ex, then write them letter that you don't send. Say everything you want to say to them, and then tear up the letter and throw it away.
- Keep in mind that even if you deny how you feel, you will still feel that way. It is better to acknowledge what you are feeling, and then let the feelings wash over you like a wave. This may be intense for a few minutes, but you will likely feel better afterwards.
- Talk to people you trust about what you are going through. Sharing with a close friend, loved one, or someone else who you trust is an excellent way to vent and work through your emotions. You may even look into a support group or therapist if you are struggling to feel better.[4]
- If you don't have a close friend or family member to talk to, reach out to an acquaintance. Ask the coworker or classmate that you have chatted with a few times if they would like to join you for lunch. You can begin a friendship by opening up to someone new.[5]
- Take a break from work or other responsibilities if possible. If you were in a serious, long-term, relationship, the end of that relationship can be a devastating blow. You may not be able to perform your usual work responsibilities as efficiently as you normally would, so taking a break from work may be necessary. If you feel comfortable, talk to your supervisor about what you are going through. Otherwise, look into sick time or vacation time that you may be able to use.[6]
- If you are in high school or college, consider telling your teacher what you are going through. Keep in mind that you will still need to submit the required work, but your teacher may be willing to give you an extension if you have fallen behind.
[Edit]Making Lifestyle Changes to Improve Your Mental State - Exercise for 30 minutes daily. Exercise causes your brain to release endorphins, which are feel-good hormones. By getting regular exercise, you can help yourself to feel better on a daily basis. Start slow if you have not exercised in a while, such as by going for a walk around your neighborhood, swimming, or riding a bike on flat terrain.[7]
- Find a type of exercise that you enjoy to make it easier to stick with it. Try dancing, kickboxing, or spinning for some fun class options.
- You can find lots of free workout videos on Youtube. Check out fitness channels with workouts that are at your physical fitness level, such as beginner if you are new to exercise or advanced if you are an exercise enthusiast.
- Nourish your body with healthy foods and beverages. The old trope of eating a pint of full-fat ice cream after a breakup exists for a reason. People tend to reach for junk food as a quick distraction from negative emotions. However, this will make you feel worse in the long run. Instead of reaching for junk, eat whole foods that will nourish your body, such as fruits, veggies, lean proteins, and whole grains. Drink lots of water, too![8]
- Avoid drinking alcohol, using drugs, and smoking. These will only produce a temporary change in your emotional state. You will feel much worse after the substance wears off.
- Get plenty of rest to feel alert during the day. Being well-rested will help to make you feel better overall as you go through your day. Aim for 7 to 9 hours of sleep every night. If you have a habit of staying up late, start turning in 30 to 60 minutes earlier than usual to ensure that you are getting enough sleep.[9]
- Make sure that your bedroom is a relaxing place that you only use for sleep! Invest in some nice sheets and blankets to make your bed feel cozy. Block out outside noise with a fan or white noise machine. Make your bedroom dark and cool to promote deep sleep.
- Use relaxation techniques to help yourself feel calmer and happier. Relaxation techniques can also help to improve your mood and promote a higher quality of life. Devote at least 15 minutes daily to relaxation. Some techniques you might try include:[10]
- Meditation
- Deep breathing
- Progressive muscle relaxation
- Yoga
[Edit]Using Fun Activities to Boost Your Mood - Work on your favorite hobby or learn something new. Doing something you love or finding a new favorite hobby is a great way to get your mind off of your breakup and start feeling happier. Whether you like to read, cook, sew, dance, or paint miniatures, take some time out for yourself every day to engage in this hobby. If you don't have a hobby, then look into something that you can learn how to do and get into right away. Some great options include:[11]
- Knitting or crocheting
- Gardening
- Cooking or baking
- Painting
- Watch or listen to something funny to make yourself happy. Even if laughing is the furthest thing from your mind, watching something funny or listening to a comedy podcast can help you to laugh a little and feel a little better as a result. Turn on a favorite comedy movie or show, watch some standup, or download a comedy podcast and immerse yourself in it.[12]
- See what comedies are available to watch on Netflix or on another streaming service that you have.
- Check Youtube for short clips and full standup routines.
- Search for comedy podcasts online or ask friends for recommendations.
- Focus on other areas of your life to improve. While you may be tempted to dissect your relationship, try to revive it, or seek out a new relationship, now is a great time to focus on other areas of your life. Consider what you might do to improve your career or grades, physical fitness, spirituality, or other relationships, such as with your friends and family.[13]
- Meet with a supervisor or teacher and ask for feedback on your performance to find out what you can do to excel.
- Join a gym or get involved with an inter-mural sports team to develop your physical strength and endurance.
- Look into churches, meditation centers, or other spiritual resources in your community.
- Call up a friend or family member who you haven't seen in a while and invite them to coffee or lunch.
- Do activities that boost your self-esteem. When you've been close with someone for a while, it's easy to start linking your sense of self-worth with the relationship. After the breakup, take time to remind yourself of who you are as a person and seek out other ways to find validation. For example, you might:
- Make a list of your strengths and accomplishments
- Challenge yourself to learn a new skill
- Do activities that help you feel good about yourself (e.g., a sport or a creative activity in which you excel)
- Surround yourself with positive people who respect and uplift you
[Edit]References [Edit]Quick Summary |
| How to Play Jenga Posted: 25 Jan 2022 04:00 PM PST Jenga is a Parker Brothers game of skill and strategy. First, stack the wooden blocks to build a tower. Then, take turns moving pieces until the tower falls over. Try to keep your hand steady! [Edit]Setting Up the Game - Set up the tower. First, shake the Jenga blocks out onto a flat surface. Then, stack the blocks in sets of three until you have built a tower that is 18 blocks high. Each new layer of three parallel blocks should be rotated 90° along the horizontal axis from the last layer.[1]
- Your Jenga set should include 54 blocks. However, if you are missing blocks, you can still play the game! Just build the tower as usual.
- Straighten out the tower. Before you play, make sure that the structure is sturdy. The block layers should interlock so that the tower stands tall without any external support. Use your hands or a flat, solid object to smooth out the sides. Push in any pieces that jut out.
- Gather players around the tower. Make sure that you have at least two players. Have everyone sit in a circle around the block structure. If you are only playing with one other person, then sit facing each other from opposite sides of the tower.[2]
- There is no strict maximum amount of players. However, it might be more fun with fewer people so that you get more turns.
- Consider writing on the blocks. This is an optional variation of Jenga. Before you stack the tower, write something on each block: a question, or a "dare," or some other directive. Then, shuffle the blocks and stack the Jenga tower as usual. When each person pulls a block from the tower, he or she must do the thing that is written on the block.
- Questions: When someone pulls a question from the tower, he or she must answer that question. Questions might be flirtatious ("Who do you most want to kiss in this room?), thoughtful ("When was a time that you felt small?"), or humorous ("What is your most embarrassing moment?")
- Dares: When someone pulls a dare from the tower, he or she must perform the action on the block. Dares might be anything from "Trade one item of clothing with the person beside you," to "Drink a shot of hot sauce," to "Make a scary face."
[Edit]Playing the Game - Pick a person to pull the first block. This can be the person who built the tower, or the person with the next birthday, or the person who most wants to start.
- Remove a block. Carefully take one block out from any level of the tower except the top. Look for the block that is the loosest, or the easiest to remove, or that will least disturb the stability of the tower. You can push the block or pull the block, depending on the angle and the location in the stack.
- Remember: you can only touch the tower with one hand a time. This rule keeps players from holding the tower steady while they pull their blocks.[3]
- Place each pulled block atop the tower. The player that pulled the block puts it back on top of the tower to continue the pattern of layering-by-threes. Try to stack them neatly so that the tower stays strong. As the game goes on, the tower will grow higher and higher until it teeters, unstable, and falls.
- Play until the tower falls. The "loser" of the game is the person who makes the tower topple. Rebuild the tower to play again![4]
[Edit]Strategizing - Be patient. Do not rush Jenga! Carefully and intentionally take your time to pull the right block when your turn comes around. If you try to go too quickly, you will be more likely to topple the tower.
- Take the easy blocks. Gently poke your way around the tower to find the pieces that are safest to remove. Look for the loose blocks and the blocks that are already sticking out of the tower. Be careful as you go, and always keep an eye on the overall stability of the structure. Make sure to maintain the balance.[5]
- Each layer of the tower has three parallel blocks: two on the outside, and one in the center. If you go for a block in the middle, you will generally be less likely to set the tower off-kilter.
- Take blocks from the top or the middle of the stack. The blocks at the bottom of the tower can be hard to remove without dangerously destabilizing the structure. The blocks near the very top can be so loose that they pull other blocks apart with them.
- Push or pull. If you're taking a block from the middle, try gently poking it through the tower from one side. If you are taking a block from the outside edge, try pinching the ends between your thumb and forefinger, then wiggling the piece back and forth until it comes loose. Use a combination of tapping and wiggling to take out difficult blocks.
- Place pulled blocks to keep balance. Notice which way the tower is tilting after you have removed your block from the stack. Then, carefully arrange your block on top so that the extra top-heavy weight won't send the tower toppling down.[6]
- Alternately: if you think you can get away with it, try placing your block on the weaker "leaning" side so that it is that much harder for the next player to pull a block.
- Play to win. If you care about the competitive aspect of the game, then you don't want the tower to fall on your turn. Try planning out your moves to destabilize the structure so that it will topple on someone else. Remove important pieces from near the bottom of the stack, and generally try to pick the best piece that you can.
- Try to be a good sport. Respect other players, and do not go out of your way to mess them up while they're taking their turns. If you make the game less fun for everyone else, then they may not want to play with you again!
- Most of the time, the blocks in either the middle or the outsides are loose, take those first! If you try to take a block that is not loose, the chances are you will make it fall.
- Try to get the blocks in the middle so there is a lower chance of the tower falling.
- Remember that you are not allowed to take a block from the top layer.
- The name of the game, Jenga, comes from the Swahili word for "to build."[7]
[Edit]Warnings - Avoid playing on a glass table! It might not stand up well to a bunch of falling blocks.
[Edit]Things You'll Need - A set of Jenga blocks
- Skill
- People to play with (unless you play solo)
[Edit]Related wikiHows [Edit]References
[Edit]Quick Summary |
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